When we let go of negative self talk, living in the past, and start taking ownership of life choices, we can live a life of no regrets. I wrote a little about getting rid of that negative self talk in this blog post and living in the present moment in this post. We all make decisions that either at the time we know is not the best choice or in hindsight we can see where another option would have been better. If we look closely we may see where we currently reside in our lives as the direct correlation to those various choices for the good and bad. They all come together to place us in the present. We may easily pat ourselves on the back for the fortitude we triumphed through, all that hard work and dedication that helped us to reach goals. However, if we are not careful the feeling of regret can be just as strong when we recognize where not so great decisions placed us in a less than ideal place in life. At one point or another we will end up in that spot because we are mere humans who have the freedom of choice.
When we challenge ourselves to embrace those mistakes and look at them as the learning opportunities that they are, we can simply move swiftly past them and even be grateful for that process making a different choice when a similar situation arises. I read a line recently that says "The negative thoughts are only shadows of reality, mucking up your mind." I love that line because it is so often true. Our negative thoughts much of the time are not even the reality of the situation. We tend to extrapolate a greater negative spin on things. When we learn to walk we do so by falling over and over until we get it right. Until we trip or have too many drinks later in life but, that's not the point. We fail and we learn. It is our natural born instinct. We did not sit on the floor and cry because we didn't get it right, the crying was because that diaper didn't have enough cushion or we needed to be changed and I'm sure that felt nastly to suddenly squish right into it. There was no judgement. We have all heard of "childlike wonder". Make a goal to get back to a childlike lack of self judgment.
3 Basic steps
Take note of the thoughts in your mind. When they turn negative, replace them with a positive. There is always positive in any situation. I made a list of positive things that came out of my house fire survival the day it happened. If I could find positive there, pretty sure you can find one in another situation.
The past is gone, you can not live there. Bask in past glories for a moment but, don't linger over them and wish they were the present moment. You can not go back and change those mistakes. Embrace them by choosing to learn from them.
No one can live your life for you. You make the choices good or bad and you have to live with them even if there are consequences. Do not place blame that only leads to toxic thoughts. Instead, forgive where you need to forgive. Yourself and others. You do have the power to take where you are and make new choices to take your future in a new direction. Let go of the fear holding you back.
Now enjoy where you are with no regerts. I mean regrets.